Signs and Symptoms of Drug Abuse in a Loved One
Signs and symptoms of drug abuse to be aware in your loved ones can be both physical and behavioral. Each drug has its own unique symptoms of abuse, and vary from drug to drug. However, some general signs that your loved one may be addicted to drugs include:
- Changes in behavior
- Withdrawal from family members
- Red or glassy eyes
- Mood swings
- Problems at school or work
- Runny or stuffy nose
- Lack of energy or motivation
- Loss of interest in hobbies, sports, and other favorite activities
- Changing sleeping pattern
- Becoming careless about personal grooming
- Sudden requests for money or a spike in how much money they spend
- Becoming careless about personal grooming
The Three C’s of Addiction
According to Project Know and the 12 steps of Al-Anon, the three C’s are important for those struggling with a loved one or family member who is facing addiction.
- I Didn’t Cause It: Good fathers do everything to provide a safe, supportive and loving environment. When dealing with addiction, it’s natural to want to blame someone: especially yourself. As a father, you must understand that you did not cause your loved one’s addiction, no matter how you may feel or what they may say. In the throes of addiction, they may cast blame, but this is simply an attempt to justify addictive behaviors. You can’t control their decisions, so you are not the cause of their addiction.
- I Can’t Cure It: You also cannot “cure” a loved one suffering from addiction. Scientifically, addiction is viewed as a chronic disease, it can not be cured but can be treated. Severe addiction is not a question of willpower, so attempts to rationalize and cure the disease of addiction is typically a waste of effort. Although sharing your thoughts and feelings, possibly even imposing consequences, are natural reactions, it’s up to your loved one to seek professional treatment.
- I Can’t Control It: Many fathers believe they can control, or manage, their loved one’s addiction. However, addiction is viewed as a disease because it biologically alters brain chemistry. After a certain time of persistent usage, they are not controlling the substance, the substance controls their thinking which results in subsequent behaviors.
Practicing Self-Care
It is easy to become consumed by a loved ones addiction and drug use. Constant worry, attempts to help or “save” them can become exhausting. This can affect your health and well-being as a result. Practicing self-care must be a priority or you are not of any use to yourself or anyone else. Denial, avoidance or becoming consumed by your loved one’s addiction is never healthy for you and can have detrimental effects. This can cause you to neglect yourself, your other children, and your family. Taking a step back from the situation and realizing you are not in control of the situation can be one of the most difficult things for a parent.
Until your loved one is ready to get help your attempts to save them will all be in vain. Working the 12 steps of Al-Anon or receiving therapy for yourself can be incredibly beneficial. While you may think you are helping a loved one there is a fine line between helping and enabling behaviors. Addicts often have to reach some sort of bottom and consequences as a result of their actions before they are ready to get help. At this time getting them professional help is the most effective way to get them the help they need to begin their journey in healing and recovery.
