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Dad’s, Be Good to Your Daughters

May 24, 2010 By Keagan Pearson 4 Comments

Although I may be biased, having three daughters of my own, there is something very special about a father/daughter relationship.  Certainly my childhood provided some valuable examples of this, but each passing year with my own family has done nothing but solidify this perception.

Over the years I have read multiple articles and posts that discussed the nature of a dad’s influence on the growth and ultimate psychological health of a daughter.  Even though my early understanding was often limited to whether or not a dad lived in the home, the value and extent of fatherly interaction plays an equally significant role.

With this in mind, I wanted to post an article that I found on the struggle facing fatherless children.  Dr. Gabriella Kortsch, the author, titled the piece “Fatherless Women” and it focuses primarily on fatherless women and how this fact manifests itself in adulthood.  Although I posted the full link to the article here, I wanted to insert a section that I found particularly meaningful.

Dad’s, you can be sure that the time spent now will form that woman you see in the years to come.

“• Seeing the Self Reflected -Optimally, a little girl needs to see herself reflected in the love she sees for herself in her father’s eyes.


• Belief in the Self-Clearly, self confidence and self esteem can be forged through one’s own endeavors during the life course, even if a father has not been present, but the path to success in such endeavors, and the reasons for which they are even attempted, tend to be quite different in the adult woman who was raised with a positive relationship to her father, as opposed to the one who was not.


• The Multi-faceted Arena of Relationships– Perhaps the arena in which the most painful process of learning how to deal with the early lack of a father is played out is in that of relationships. If a girl has not been assured of her value as a woman by that early relationship with the father, she finds it difficult to relate to men precisely because she may often unconsciously seek to find that recognition in the eyes of the beloved…and this may lead her down an early path of promiscuity…


• Avoiding Engaging the Emotions– Another possible scenario is that of avoiding relationships totally.


• Marrying ‘Daddy– Other women may choose another route, falling in love with an older man and thus marrying ‘daddy.’ At this point many different scenarios may ensue. If the man is at all psychologically aware (something often, but not always lacking in older men who like younger girls), he may have a vague inkling of what is going on. Therefore, once she starts – within the secure confines of the relationship or marriage – the process of growth, which will inevitably lead her to separate from her husband in some ways that are emotionally and psychologically necessary in order for her become her own woman, he will not blanch in fear at this process, and allow her the necessary space and freedom to do so.


• Finding Self-Confidence and Recognition in the Self– The core of the matter is, of course, that the self-confidence and recognition so avidly sought must be found within oneself rather than in the outer world.“

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About Keagan Pearson

Keagan is a family man, marketer, and project driver. He is the founder of LaunchBlot Media and FatherhoodFactor.com. You can connect with him personally at: Facebook – Twitter – Instagram – LinkedIn – Email

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