So Dad, what do you do when your teen son reluctantly announces that his girlfriend is pregnant with his child? It’s not exactly the kind of news you want to hear on a lazy Sunday afternoon, but it’s not the end of the world, either. Your reaction and how you move forward will have a major impact on how well your son and his partner are able to manage the storm that lies ahead.
What Makes A Boy A Man?
What better way to be thrown into manhood than by becoming a father? Okay, there are better ways, but there are worse ways too. Your son is a man now, whether he likes it or not. This is the perfect opportunity for him to learn that if he wants to be treated like a man, then he has to act like one.
Your Grandchild Is A Blessing
Despite the consequences your son has placed upon himself, never forget – this is a happy occasion! You’re grandparents! Your son is a father! He might not be all grown up yet, but he is a man! The miracle that is life has been created right before your eyes; this is an opportunity for celebration!
Your son may not be ready to be a dad, but were you ready when you became parents? No one is every ready for parenthood the first time, not really. His decisions and actions will largely depend on the level of support and encouragement that he receives from you.
You may think that your son is too immature to do the right thing. You may think that he won’t step up and be responsible. You know that he’ll need to get a job, and he may even need to postpone his education to support his baby. If he’s not showing any interest, don’t just let him off easy by doing the job for him.
He might not be showing any initiative, and you might think that there’s no way he’s going to take responsibility for his actions. As tempting as it may be, don’t tell him that he has to either man up or move out. That will simply make him feel isolated. To succeed as a dad, he needs his parents as allies, not adversaries. Your son may actually surprise you and rise to the challenge, but in order for that to happen, you may need to surprise him first. You need to remember that he came to you; he wanted you to know because he needs your support and advice.
How to Boost Your Son’s Confidence and Self-Esteem:
- Surprise him by showing him how happy you are that he gets to experience the joy of being a parent. Just like you did.
- Surprise him by showing enthusiasm and offering to help him live up to his new responsibilities.
- Surprise him by telling him how proud you are of him for stepping up to the challenge, getting a job, and taking care of his baby and the baby’s mother.
He messed up, he knows this and he’s expecting you to shove that fact in his face. Surprise him, and he may surprise you back.
And Now You Have A Daughter
Your son has a rough road ahead, and his partner has an even rougher road ahead. She may not technically be your daughter-in-law, but accept her and support her anyway, even if she’s initially uncomfortable with your involvement. Welcome her and her child into your family. Nothing you do will benefit your grandchild, the mum, and your son more than offering them your unconditional love and support.