Everyone knows that ‘perfect’ does not exist. There is no perfect parent and there is no perfect child. So why do we still strive for perfection?
No one wants to be labeled a failure, especially when it comes to parenting. Add in the pressure of juggling a successful career with successful parenting and some days, more often than not, it becomes too much. It’s always a good idea to take a step back and re-evaluate it all.
Are we parenting in a way that is causing more harm than good? We try and protect our kids from things like disappointments and their fears, get too involved with their friendships and basically attempt to put a layer of invisible bubble wrap around every inch of them.
We all remember the movie, “Finding Nemo”, when Dory makes a pretty deep statement to the orange Clownfish, referring to his parenting skills and letting go. “Well, you can’t never let anything happen to him. Then nothing would ever happen to him.” I love that line as it is very powerful.
The best way to change certain behaviors is to be aware of them ahead of time. Everyone makes mistakes and it is those mistakes that help us learn, grow and ultimately become better fathers.
I want to offer all you dads out there some encouragement that it’s okay to mix things up a bit. Did a discipline method you tried today totally backfire? Try something new tomorrow. Every day is a new day to be a better parent.
One common mistake I see all the time is using the philosophy of “one size fits all” parenting. Every child is different, even in the same household. You can have two kids that are complete opposites and therefore, have different needs and require different types of parenting solutions.
As parents, we are going to make hundreds of mistakes. Help Your Teen Now focuses on 12 of them, and I have no problem admitting I have made all 12.
Do you spoil your kids and give them everything they ask for, like the latest phone or the coolest sneakers everyone at school is wearing? Yep, been there. It’s great to see our kids happy, however, spoiling them is not going to provide them with necessary life skills to function as adults.
Usually, the tools we are given to parent come from how we were parented. While certain principles still apply, every generation is different and requires alterations to make sense in today’s world. Remember that your kids are not you and you are not your parents. Guilty as charged.
Are you afraid to discipline your children at the supermarket for fear they are going to have public meltdowns and people will judge you? Uh, YES. You are most likely fearful of the consequences of delivering the consequences to your kids. I know I was. When your kids grow up, guess what? The real world isn’t going to protect them like you are now.
See, you’re not alone. The good news is that being able to recognize these mistakes early on and be willing to modify your parenting skills accordingly, is going to benefit your kids in the present and in the long run.
If it makes you feel any better, I think it is safe to say we all experience crappy parenting days and feel like we are the worst parents in the world. It is the bad ones that help us appreciate the good ones. Remember, no one is perfect. It is all about progress, not perfection.
