Parenting Sons | Fatherhood Factor

If you surveyed 100 fathers and asked them what age their son was when they really started to connect, many of them would likely say when he was around his teenage years. Some dads seem to have trouble connecting with their sons at a younger age.

Regardless of the reason for this issue, we feel some of it comes from not knowing what to do with them until they’re old enough to do “manlier” things. Ahead, we’ve created a list of fun activities for a father and his younger son to do together. Don’t miss out on any good times early in your son’s life.

Take Him To a Ball Game

Many people would go with the cliché “play catch with him,” but we think actually taking your son to a sporting event is a better use of your time. No matter how young he is, he’ll enjoy the food, the excitement of the crowd, and whatever silly things the mascot is doing. Sure, he might not remember it when he’s older, but this could be the event that sparks an interest in the sport down the road, which could lead to many games of catch in the front yard.

Build or Fix Something Together

Some dads think that this idea is only suitable for older children, but building or fixing something together is an excellent way to bond. Give your son some easy tasks, like grabbing a tool or twisting in a screw.

If you’re working on something for your son, he’ll be more likely to want to help. For example, some people like to modify their child’s ride-on.

Go on a Camping Trip

If you want your son to experience the outdoors, take him on a father-son camping trip. On this trip, you can teach him how to fish, set up a tent, or even build a campfire. If he likes it, you could turn it into a yearly tradition, finding new things to teach him every year.

Play Some Games With Him

If none of our previous fun activities for a father and his younger son to do together seem to be working, you might have to do something on his terms. Many kids are into video games these days; try playing one or two of them with him. Even if you aren’t very good, your son will appreciate that you’re trying it out with him.

If you want to meet him halfway on this subject, try to find a board game that he likes. If you need more players, get the whole family involved and make it a family game night. Regardless of what you do, taking an interest in the things your son likes goes a long way.

It can be tough for parents to calmly approach their children when they are being disrespectful and taking their bad attitude out on you. I completely understand the feeling of looking at your child being disrespectful and thinking, ‘I literally provide you with everything, and this is how you are going to treat me?’

But, if you want to help your son reach his potential and become a successful and happy adult, you’ll need to put those feelings aside and work patiently with him to correct his disrespectful attitude.

Talk To Your Son About His Disrespectful Attitude

One of the first things you will need to do is talk to your son about his attitude. While most kids know when they are being disrespectful, they may not realize the impact it is having on their loved ones. Even teens who feel like they have outgrown their parents still hold their parents upon a kind of pedestal, not believing that their words and attitudes can really affect their parents.

Also, some teenage boys consider being disrespectful to others is funny. Often, these boys will be disrespectful to their friends, egg each other on to be more and more outrageous, all while believing that everyone is enjoying the joke.

So, when you talk to your son about his behavior and attitude, keep these things in mind, especially if all you get back is puzzling responses like:

“I don’t really see what the problem is.”

“I didn’t mean it, so it doesn’t count.”

“Everyone else does it.”

While these kinds of responses are frustrating, it can help you gauge where your son is coming from and help you determine how serious a problem it is likely to be to help him overcome his disrespectful ways.

Set Clear Expectations About Your Son’s Behavior

Children are constantly pushing the boundaries of what is allowed, and if your son is taking a disrespectful attitude with you, this can be just one more way of expressing that boundary pushing.

So, after you two talk about his attitude, it is time to set clear expectations about your son’ attitude and behavior. Things like no name-calling, being required to answer verbally when asked a question and not just shrugging are good places to start with setting your expectations.

When your son disregards these behavioral expectations, focus on practicing positive discipline. It is best if you outline the consequences of being disrespectful before the outburst, but it is not possible to anticipate all circumstances. If your son behaves disrespectfully, make it clear to him that what he did was disrespectful and that you will be talking to him later about the consequences.

Not only will this response give you time to cool down and consider fair disciplinary measures, but it also gives your son to consider his actions and attitude and see that he was in the wrong.

Model The Respectful Behavior You Expect To See

As the father, your son will model much of his behavior on your example. Even if your son tries to pretend that he is nothing like you, scholars have seen that fathers play a critical place in shaping their children.

For instance, my father is a pretty sarcastic man. When I was younger, I thought he was the height of wittiness and modeled a lot of my own attitude on what I thought was his cool disregard of “boring, dumb people.” Thank goodness my high school track coach sat me down and made it clear that far from being cool, I was just a jerk that most people didn’t want to work out with on the team.

So, it may take a bit a soul-searching, but you may find that some of your son’s disrespectful attitude was learned from you and it is essential that you model the behavior you expect to see.

Bring In Professional Help

Reaching out to professional resources can help enormously. Many of us parents are trying to figure out parenting as we go, and having a trained therapist assist can be invaluable. Depending on your son and your family’s needs, a combination of family therapy and individual therapy for your son can help him overcome his disrespectful attitude and help the whole family become more harmonious.

If your son isn’t able to overcome his disrespectful attitude at home, and it is leading him down more dangerous paths, it may be time to consider a boarding school for troubled teens. At a good school, he can receive more concentrated help and enjoy a supportive environment that will help him make the changes he needs.

Hold Onto A Sense Of Humor

As you help your son outgrow his disrespectful attitude, keeping a firm hold on your sense of humor can help you keep things calm. So, the next time your son snaps back a sassy answer, you can find the humor and stay calm enough to say, “Wow, kind of rude there. Did you mean that to be a rude answer?”

By not allowing your son to unravel your calm and sense of humor, you are providing him with a chance to reflect on his attitude and understand that his behavior is out-of-line.

Working with your son to help him overcome his disrespectful attitude won’t be easy on either of you, especially as you manage your various roles besides being “just dad”. But by doing this work while your child can still change easily, you can help set your son up to be a better-adjusted adult who is more capable in his interactions with others.

Fun Activities for a Father and His Young Son To Do