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Raising Teenagers

His Life is Good: So Why Is My Son Depressed?

May 29, 2019 By Alex Schaffer Leave a Comment

As a parent, it can be hard to watch your child hurting, especially when you don’t know how to help them. When you see your child dealing with depression, it can feel overwhelming to get a handle on.

Depression seems like something a teen shouldn’t have to deal with. How can they be depressed when they’re in the prime of their life? Many parents feel guilty when their child has poor mental health and think it’s some shortcoming on their part.

In truth, both adults and teenagers can struggle with depression. Most often, a child’s depression has nothing to do with their home life. The best thing you can do for a depressed teen is to help them open up and be patient.

What is Depression in Teenagers?

Unfortunately, in spite of the best living conditions in history, more young people than ever are experiencing depression. That’s why it’s of paramount importance to communicate the significance of mental health.

Many people, teens especially, will avoid seeking help for fear of looking weak. They may even feel guilty for not being able to control their emotions. This is a very frustrating mindset to have, and it’s a tough one to break.

During such pivotal times in a teenager’s life, it’s essential for parents to teach their children about the signs and symptoms of depression.

Many teenagers don’t have a full grasp on depression and can’t distinguish it from other conditions like sadness or stress. If that’s true for your teen, they can’t see the signs within themselves and know when to ask for help.

By teaching them the symptoms of depression and anxiety you can help them learn how to cope with stress. This also helps them overcome any other mental health issues that they’re dealing with.

What Causes Depression in Teens?

Parents often wonder what their kids have to be depressed about. They aren’t dealing with any significant familial or financial responsibilities. They have it easy compared to the responsibilities we face as adults.

But that’s not the way we should be thinking about their situation. Remember what it was like to be a teenager. Many teens are experiencing stress for the first time in their lives. Without having the stress management skills we’ve developed over years of adult life; this can be overwhelming for a teen.

Teens can suffer from depression for a variety of different reasons. A common cause being academic pressure. This is especially true for high schoolers that are starting to worry about making the grades to get into a good college.

Another frequent source of depression in teens is from social pressures. The need to fit in and be liked can put a lot of stress on a teen. Being unable to make quality friends can take a toll on a teen’s self-esteem and result in depression.

Home life is sometimes another source of depression for teenagers. Was there a recent divorce in the family? Have there been any changes in the family dynamic lately? These changes can cause grief, and when grief goes unaddressed long enough it can become chronic and lead to depression.

Every teen is different and the causes for depression will vary from person to person. In some cases, it’s an amalgamation of various stresses that manifest as depression. The best thing you can do is talk to your teen and ask what’s on their mind. You will also want to keep an eye out for any signs that could suggest your child is depressed.

Signs That Your Teen Could Be Depressed

There are a variety of signs you should keep an eye out for that indicate your child could be dealing with depression. The most common symptoms include little energy or motivation, changes in appetite, trouble sleeping, poor performance at school, and isolation.

Every person is different, and the way depression will manifest depends on the individual’s coping strategies. You’ll want to keep an eye out for any behaviors that seem unusual for your teen. For example, one sign previously mentioned is insomnia, but for some teens, they may actually start sleeping more than usual.

There are other signs that may also indicate depression, but if any unusual changes persist for more than two weeks, it’s worth looking into. As with any indicators of declining mental health, you’ll want to get the issues dealt with before they get worse.

If you notice any signs of self-harm, then the issue needs to be addressed immediately. Some examples include cutting, burning, scratching, pulling out the hair or nails, and peeling off skin. If your teen starts to cover themselves with more clothes than usual, besides from a change in temperature, this could indicate either self-harm or low self-esteem.

How to Help

Sometimes depressed teens may not always be able to ask for help. As the parent it falls on you to get them the resource to battle their depression. Encourage your child to speak with you or another trusted adult who could help them manage their depression.

The most important thing you can do for your child is make them feel they can be open and honest with you about how they’re feeling. If they’re struggling with suicidal thoughts, you want them to feel like they can share that with you without getting upset. Issues like this aren’t always easy for a parent to deal with, but you have to be patient and respond empathetically.

If your child does not feel safe to opening up, you may not catch the signs that they’re depressed. When they do open up to you, you will want to help them understand what depression is and what their options are. Include them in discussions about mental health so they don’t shy away from getting help.

Counseling is also a good option for anxious or depressed teens. Discussing the various treatment methods with your teen and listening to their feedback is a smart first step towards recovery.

Remind them that everyone suffers from depression in their lives and that it takes strength and courage to get help. You can also remind them that depression doesn’t last forever and that there’s light at the end of the tunnel.

Top 5 Christmas Gifts for Moody Teenagers – By a Moody Teenager

September 27, 2012 By Daniel Smulevich Leave a Comment

Something happens to some kids when they hit their teens. They say it’s something to do with their hormones but all I know is that some teenagers have mood swings that can be hard to deal with. Take my word for it, I was one of those moody teenagers, and I remember my parents struggling with buying Christmas gifts for me and my brother. Every single year.

I just hit my twenties, so I thought I would write down this little list of ideas to help you during your research into what impresses a teenager at Christmas.

Music Gifts

Nearly all teenagers like popular music so a voucher could do for you, or if you are feeling really brave, buying an actual album would be a good safe bet. If you are going down the voucher route there are a number of different websites that can make your life easier.

Apple’s iTunes is the big daddy of music retailing and there are easy ways to buy gift vouchers from their website; you can get a voucher emailed to your intended recipient or you can print one off yourself, or you can even choose a predesigned card and voucher to be sent to your address. You can also buy films, applications and books in the same way. The same can be done through retailers like amazon and hmv, so shop around and see what deals are there to be found.

Car Breakdown Coverage

If the teenager you are spoiling has a car then find out if it’s covered for breakdown recovery. This is a great gift idea as most teens have very old cars that are more susceptible to break-downs.  If your teenager doesn’t have a car then what about a contribution to driving lessons or even a contribution to a car fund!

An Experience

This is getting to the more expensive end of the scale but you can get a driving experience for your moody teen in a Lamborghini for as little as $89. The only real restrictions are that they must be under 6’6” and not be over 252lbs, which should make it open to most teens, I hope!

You could also look at a flying lesson. These also start at about $77 for an hour and the age restriction is as low as 12 years old. Flying can really help confidence and give your moody teen some sense of achievement…plus, sunglasses are recommended all year round, so your teen can look cool too!

A Subscription

A subscription used to mean a copy of ‘Just 17’ delivered to your door for a year, however subscriptions have moved on and now you can buy a number of different services that will appeal to your teenager. The first big leap in subscriptions is mobile phone top ups and subscriptions. If you are a Vodafone subscriber you can add a certain amount each month to another account you are controlling. You can also top up data usage if your teenager has a tablet or dongle for wireless internet access. Anyone who gives more access to the internet is going to be held aloft like a God in any teenager’s eyes. If you have a moody teenager who is a console game player it is possible to pay for their online connection subscription, which allows them to play online games. Or you could look at buying a subscription to a film database, like LoveFilm or NetFlix, starting at $7 per month.

A Gadget or an Accessory

What about an iPod Shuffle for $52? Most teenagers will already have a phone and a laptop, so what about buying something to complement their gadgetry? You can buy phone cases and laptop covers, starting at $13 or you could buy some headphones for your moody teenager. If you really wanted to be helpful and see into the future, you could buy gadget insurance for you teenager, but I can imagine the teenagers face when on Christmas morning they open a card with an insurance document in it….

Hopefully this article has given you some ideas of what to buy your moody teenager. They are growing so quickly and they cannot control some of their mood swings so forgive their mistakes and brighten their day as they try and deal with all those mixed emotions.

It’s tough to be a teen.

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